Journeying Through Food in Love

AI Dal

I know myself well enough that I know doing this sort of thing semi-publicly is the only way to persist. Not that today was a disaster or anything; it was fine, even good, but it doesn't take a disaster to... lose interest. I've always had the reflex of changing the channel when the current one is arduous, which is specifically the reflex I'm trying to break.

Losing interest is out of the question.

And there's lots to be interested in. Do you know what jalebi is? Neither did I, until I bought it. A week ago ChatGPT (whom I should really name for as often as I'll mention it) was telling me about things I might see around my heavily South Asian neighborhood of Jackson Heights, and it described something I remembered having JUST seen on the walk home, so I put my coat on and ran out the door and bought it. Basically it's the funnel cake of the East. It's sort of made the same way and it's the same shape, but instead of being dusted in powdered sugar, it's coated in the stickiest sugar syrup known to man. It's good, -ish. I think it would be best hot. But it only came in a big box of maybe twelve, so I bought the whole box from the guy at the sidewalk table , for five or six dollars, self-consious about pronouncing the word I had JUST read (JAH-le-bi? jah-LE-bi?), and took it home and had a cold jalebi. It was okay. I microwaved it (or maybe the next one; I don't think I really wanted another but I was coming to terms with having bought, you know, a whole box), which was my first time using my landlord/roommate's microwave, and it was really weak, so thirty seconds barely warmed it up, so I sat at my desk in the evening lamplight and crunched (because they're ever so slightly crunchy) lukewarm South Asian funnel cake.

What does this have to do with today? Well, I was so underwhelmed that the rest of the box of jalebi sat in the fridge (where I honestly have to store almost everything for fear of six-legged buffet crashers) for a week, and I even made a sticky note for myself reminding me to throw the sticky pastries at an opportune time, along with the unripe bananas that, because they were in the fridge also, turned brown before they even got soft (???). But this morning, conscious of having made a public vow of thriftiness, and feeling besides that it was too big an admission of small-mindedness to throw the jalebi and have a slice of wheat bread instead, I said you know, why not give one a real shot in the microwave and see what it does for you?

This time thirty or forty seconds got it (and the plate, somehow) scalding hot, so I guess it's just one of those microwaves. And you know, I'm definitely hungrier than I was last week, but it also was, really, quite a bit better when it was properly warm. I had that, a glass of milk (milk I already had), and coffee, which, being sans device, I make by pouring hot water into a cup with grounds in it and waiting for the grounds to settle. It's surprisingly good!

Did I mention that it's Lent? It is, which means I'm kind of cheating, because I'm fasting 6/7 days of the week which makes eating cheaply a bit easier. It's the old "eating less" ruse. The first week of "two-small-meals-that-don't-equal-a-meal-then-one-main-meal" was surprisingly tough given how often I believed I ate according to that pattern anyway, by accident. You don't realize how much you do something until you can't do it anymore, and I realized that first week that I thought about wanting food constantly. But this far along, I feel pretty good with just a week old jalebi and cowboy-style coffee in the morning.

Wow, that was the least interesting part of the eating day, and I just typed all that.

I had ONE slice of that wheat bread left, and a lot of peanut butter, and I was going to the store in the evening, so after school I loaded up that one precious slice with peanut butter, and butter, which, being in the fridge, and consequently unspreadable, I cut like a banana and plopped down in slices on the bread. And speaking of banana, having so nobly redeemed my jalebi from extinction, the feelings of magnanimity spread to the brown bananas, and I thought it couldn't hurt to, mm, actually open one, instead of staring blankly at it, and see how it was faring. And it was faring fine. It was still not exactly a ripe banana but it was okay. So I cut that, too, like a --- banana --- and plopped that down on top of the butter, and ate the whole thing. It was okay. I'm glad no one French was watching. I'll get better.

Did you know there's "no such thing as curry"? I looked it up because I'm like, people keep saying curry this and curry that, but, what is curry? Apparently, in India, at least traditionally, there was no specific thing called "curry". "Curry" is just a foreign (British) generalization of many diverse spicy and gravy-like dishes, at least according to my sources. I haven't had it before so it's still foggy to me. (It's weird when something is a category to some peoples and not others. Portuguese doesn't use the concept of "berry". English speakers think we know what a berry is: it's small, somewhat round, probably at least a little sweet, and comes in all kinds of varieties like blue, rasp, and straw. But the Portuguese and Brazilian just call them mirtilo, framboesa, and morango, and don't really seem to care about the special relationship they all have. Maybe English is just a very categorical language.)

Anyway, I think about this, and research it, because I live around so many Indians and Bengalis, and it makes me curious. Even though my food budget is super tight now, I don't want to miss out on the opportunity that my proximity to so much different food affords me. So in that spirit, I decided to take my shopping this week in a subcontinental direction. Not a hard choice, as almost all the grocery stores nearby are Indian anyway.

ChatGPT told me, because I goaded it to, that I was going to make dal --- Indian lentils. Eating "lentils" is sad, but eating dal is exotic and cool! And it further told me that I was going to put random things in it like cumin seeds and chili powder, which I thought was kind of cool. Though I had no idea what a whole cumin seed looked or tasted like.

I have this preoccupation as I buy food that someone (the chorus from a Greek play, maybe?) is watching all my choices, ready to pounce if I select the wrong thing. "HAHAHahaha," the chorus says, "YOU think you know what to do with THAT? AHahahaha, I can tell you've never bought this before. Everyone, look what he's buying, hahahahah!" I'm old enough to know that's stupid, and in the "regular" grocery store that voice has died down some, but once I'm the only white person in a busy Indian grocery store, ACTUALLY buying things I know almost nothing about, the fact of actually standing out does bring that voice back, a little. I still know it's stupid, but there it is. Honestly, I myself am an innately judgmental person, and I think an inherit aspect of being a judgmental person is, conversely, always feeling judged yourself. It's best to let both ends of that go.

I was able to relax, though, enough to enjoy myself and take a long time to explore every aisle and take note of new things, to look up later. I learned that "Chakki Atta" which they sold in huuuge bags for cheeep is basically all-purpose flour. "Masala" was a word that turned up everywhere and just means "spice blend", which explains why it was always preceded by another word like "garam". The whole back wall was lentils! Lentils! Lentils! I got Masoor dal --- red lentils --- for $3, and enough for probably two or three weeks of straight lentils.

Though we all know that's deceptive, because when you are starting from nothing, the supporting ingredients add up really fast. Sure, the lentils are $3, but so is the turmeric; the chili powder is $4, the cumin seeds are $2, etc., etc...

My total leaving the store was $37.85. So, my food destiny this weekend is set. It's going to be a lot of lentils.

But not JUST lentils. That total was for

So this week will not be very varied, though spicy garlic masoor dal is hardly penance, but as I acquire more staples I can diversify. Please send recommendations for everything chili powder can do.

But my garlicy lentils actually turned out well enough, even though the first time cooking anywhere is always a little frustrating, and this time was no different. It wasn't a barbeque, sadly, but I didn't expect that, and I actually didn't expect to feel as full as I did after eating a 3/4 cup (dry) of lentils with a bowl of yogurt and one and half pitas. I think the butter-garlic-cumin-chili sauce that went on top was supposed to be more red, and it was more brown, thanks to the cooked butter, but maybe if I did it properly with ghee that would fix it (oh gosh though that would make a dent in the budget whatever week I bought that in, ghee is not given away even at Indian grocery stores despite having floor-to-ceiling ghee options). I think it bodes well for this Lentin week, at least.

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Onwards and upwards!